profile I'm Debbiegrace,and I'm on hiatus until the school year is over. archives May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 April 2009 affiliates Mayann Nicole Lennon Gracee Merlyn Shilee Timo Celine Cherylt Weiling Tim Tricia AiJing HuiHui Rachel Keolala! whisper. credits skin by: Jane |
LISTEN : Friday, November 14 at 11:32 PM
Let me get this straight : I don't care who's reading this post. Really. I'm gna die if I don't write it all out. I could say I don't want you to read this, but I know you will anyway. Ugh, I hate this feeling. Haha. Talked to gor ( Chinese for elder brother ) about the section and band and everything. I think SYF is getting to me 'cause honestly I wouldn't care otherwise. I just wna get it over and done with. I told him about Weiling crying and how I could have slapped her if Liangping and Aggie hadn't thought of how to make her feel better. How my section has a really horrid tone, how I feel like a horrible senior/sl when I'm really strict and all but I know I've gotta 'cause everyone's so bloody slack we'll never get anywhere if I weren't, how my juniors are so childish I could kill them, how I just don't get why they can't even get their notes and simple rhythms right.. etcera. If I went on I may die of a heart attack thinking about it. But what he told me (and what others told me) makes sense. He said I oughta be more patient and understanding 'cause afterall, not everyone's been learning theory since they were 5 and just because picking up the clarinet was a breeze for me in sec one (it wasn't, really. I just practiced really hard. ) doesn't mean it's easy for everyone. And I guess I am very impatient. But I'm not always like that. I mean, if you don't give me a reasont to scream at you, I won't. And if you cry, I'm not the type that'll be all over you, asking you if you're okay. Unless you're like, my best friend or something. Then yes, I would. UGH I AM SO PISSED OFF. I can't believe I was so weak, crying over the tinest, littlest, most insignificant things. People must have thought I was really attention seeking and stupid and immature and weak, weak, weak. But yeah, being 13, I guess that was an excuse in itself. I can't even believe I actually had to sit down and let them choose their parts today! I think, I'm a hopeless SL. Lol. But honestly, I've got one last hurdle before I disappear from the face of WCB. Like, who the hell cares whether my section hates me or not as long as they can produce the best sound ever? I know I don't. Of course it'll be ideal if my whole section were really close (like last SYF) but I don't know :\ At least the rest of the seniors aren't as impatient as me. It ain't that bad, right? Whatever :D Hahah! Time to be happy because you're gone and I'm actually alright with it! I'm over it. Three cheers for me. |